poem Friday

wow, isn't this how we all feel, when it comes down to it?

A Watcher

By: Robyn Sarah

The mail doesn't come
and doesn't come.
The mail doesn't come.
It's three o'clock, I've been
downstairs to check, and up again,
and down and up — it
doesn't come.

Incognito in the little shops
is how I want to go.
And in and out
about the neighbourhood,
observing unobserved.

And yet I long, I long.
Long to be known, and know.

growing up. snapshots.

In between the fevers, and the ear aches, the stitches. the whining and the tantrums.

I hear, "I love you, mommy".

a spontaneous, "I love you".

they are screaming, and we've been running around all day. It's time for Mass. I really just want to lay down.

but I'm hungry.

We wrangle, and find shoes. load up. drop off.

My fingers find the water. The cross forming over my head. my heart.

"You belong to God". This motion. This sign. to make me remember.

It's quiet. We kneel before Jesus. the candle is lit. He's there. in the box. so they say.

I can't get my mind around it, but I kneel.

"you belong to God". This motion. Knees on cushion. to make me remember.

The next hour ebbs and flows. I say the words.

"I am not worthy, that you should enter under my roof, but only say the words and my soul shall be healed"

and every week, it feels like it is.

this week made me so crazy....

I went back to blonde.

mid life crisis.

sort of.

the cherry on top of the cherry.

Well, I  might as well keep documenting this week- this is totally for Millie's own amusement when she reads this one day....

So yesterday, after another long night, I just had that feeling that the antibiotics from that urgent care visit were not worth anything. It was a 5-day z-pack which is not really the recommended drug for ear infections, which I even told the doc- but whatever, his pride wouldn't let him prescribe the augmenten which is the only thing that has worked in the past. So irritating!!!! Why did I even bother going?

So, long story short, we ended up back at the dr yesterday. Both ears, STILL infected, and one eardrum ruptured. Seriously, Could this child have a more pitiful week? She was in so much pain yesterday and last night, she just shook. It broke my heart.

Thankfully, the wonderful pediatrician loaded us up with antibiotics and pain killer, and today, she seems really well. She still complains when it gets to be re-dosing time, but anyway.  life is looking up again.

I haven't caught up, but when does a mom ever, really?

Sorry to bore you with the mundane. This is pretty much my baby book, diary, and creative writing outlet all in one, so you know- it is what it is!

cherry on top

Just a few moments after that last entry, Annie wacked Mille with a toy, resulting in 2 stitches, which subsequently took 5 years off my life. 

Annie was super sad. Millie was, well traumatized by the whole experience. And I need an adult beverage.

Poor Millie, things can only look up from here, right???

a good idea?

Well, the weekend started off with some rain. And being the spontaneous mom that I am, I let Annie and Millie get in their rain gear and play in the mud puddles. They loved it. What I failed to consider were Millie's already "allergies", that were in full force. Well, we pressed the repeat button Saturday morning, more playing in the wet grass and dirt.

And, well, Saturday night no sleep was had by one little Millie. Sunday, we ended up at Urgent Care with fever and two ear infections!

Last night was a little better as long as we  stayed on top of the fever. I think the antibiotic kicked in because she's sleeping great right now.

At least she had fun, right?

Sometimes I feel like God made people like me to help encourage others that your kids will survive without the occasional sunscreen, jumping in mud puddles with colds, what have you.

I'm kidding, kind of.

anyway, it's monday, which means back on the wagon. we had our ice cream and fast food fix this weekend. We managed a cooked meal, too. 

happy monday.

rainy days

We're having a rainy day here, well it looks like a rainy week ahead, along with cooler temperatures. It's like you can feel the entire state breathe a long, collective sigh.

we made it.

I even had the heart to order Annie her Fall shoes today. It's actually coming.

I wish you could see my house. Clothes everywhere. Dishes piled. pj's adorned.

It's just that kind of day.

And for you, on this day, a poem, from my beloved Writers Almanac. A reminder of the seasons, the liturgy of life, so to speak, reminding us with its beginnings and endings.

The story keeps marching on. and yet shares itself over and over. Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring.

Thanks be to God.


CLOSING THE CABIN by: Thom Tammaro
I
In the yawn of dusk,
We drift home in Minnesota autumn,
Reciting the litany once more:

Dock in; boathouse latched;
Rugs rolled; plugs pulled;Windows hinged; 
floors swept;
Pilots out; pipes drained;
Faucets opened; doors locked;
Hummingbird feeder taken down;
Key hanging in its secret place.
II
In the flicker of lights near the city's edge
We talk easily, gather within
All that the summer has given:
A great fish, slender and shiny,Diving for bottom;
 loons calling In the still afternoon;
Stars swirling above the rooftops.
Near home, vees of geese circle,
Circle in the shadows above us.
III
Later that night, we pause
On the stairs — winterward —Unlock that other season
Where little puffs of winter dust
Rise when we open the door.

odds and ends

1. Vega-  I took some silly plunge and decided to buy some "Vega" whole food supplement. It just seems no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to get in the nutrition I know that I need. Anyway, It tastes like dirt with steevia in it, but I am dumping it in a strawberry smoothie, and I can get it down:) The nutritional benefits are crazy good, so I'll finish the container if it kills me.

I have to cut the scoop in half. It's just too much for me, so I guess I am getting the nutritional benefits of 1 egg, 1/2 cup a yogurt, 1 salmon, 1.5 slices of bread, 1.5 veggies, and 1 cup of blueberries (antioxidant benefit)

I thought this might be a meal replacement, and I guess it kind of is breakfast for now. Anyway, I'll report back when I finish the  container, which may take all year.

2. It's trying SO hard to be Fall here. 

3. I discovered Nordstrom's online shopping. Free shipping and returns. My life may never be the same.

4. We are back on meal planning. I am planning 3 meals a week, each with a leftover night. Last week worked!

5. gotta go.

princess

It's going to be 100 again today. I have lost the will to deal with this at this point, so we are running around in diapers and princess clothes. Annie is in underwear wrapped in blankets watching Sound of Music, or like she calls it "The music family". She has a fever.

It only took 2 school days, and there you go. I am sure Millie will be next.

As you can tell, Millie has turned into quite the personality.

She is doing great in school, too. Slept on her nap mat like a big girl. So proud.

Annie did great, too. She loves school. Loves her friends. Annie is all about love.

Ok, I might get dressed or something.

It's Friday!