I'm tired of looking at the old school metal mini blinds in our bedroom.
which is why
I am making curtains this weekend.
we'll see if my vision can come together.
I should also mention that I had the most luxurious nap today while BOTH little girls slept in perfect harmony.
(note to readers, may want to stop reading as the next part talks about breastfeeding, if you are not in to that thing)
So, one of my goals for this little girl was to be able to nurse her.
So, I didn't nurse Annie because I was pretty much recovering from a traumatic event, I was scared to death, and I needed to sleep at night knowing exactly what she was getting and how much. I needed some control, and a bottle offered me that. so that's that.
but I was sad. it was something I wanted to do- and it was in some strange way taken from me, and well, I hoped for things to be different this go round.
and they have been. I am not one of these people who have a strong attachment to nursing. If anything, one the negatives I have observed, is how little time Josh gets with her right now. With Annie, it was such a family effort, so to speak. There were bottles and the warming of bottles, and anyone could feed her.
but this, this is intense. this is a human being attached to you almost all hours of the day.
which is why I almost kissed my friend when she told me she fed all her breastfed babies (all 3) 1-2 bottles a day starting at 2 weeks.
permission. why do we need it? There aren't rules, here- but so many people make you feel like there are. and it's my fault for listening. For thinking there was a set of rules that I was breaking. for forgetting about freedom. and grace.
so i started doing this a couple of nights ago. It's the one three hour break I get all day.
so, I learn. I enjoy it. I hate it. I bargain with how long I'll last.
I don't know any of the answers. I'm glad she likes me. I'm glad I can give her what she needs. It's a gift, and I am learning about sacrifice, which is something I was found wanting in.
and i love her, which makes all the difference.
7 comments :
Love this. and love you.
oops. that is obviously Camille not aaron. too lazy to change it now. :)
The kids and I watched the movie Babies tonight (the kids give it two thumbs down: booooring), but it was a good reminder to me that there are so many different ways of raising babies....you do what's best for you and the little ones, where God leads you. It's all good. Glad you got some rest today!
I have nursed all 3 of mine thus far and you can bet your bottom dollar that as soon I could I was making some bottles to get Neal involved in the process and give me a little break. I think he enjoyed the time with the babies and liked knowing that he was helping me too.
Goodness Brooksie do whatever works!! Keep it simple - breast feeding is far from simple in the beginning but it does become that way. I totally gave Eli at least 2 bottles a day from day one home from the hospital - and girl I didn't pump those bottles (because well pumping sucks)!! Formula all the way. So my boy didn't care he took a bottle of formula from Daddy and breast milk from mom. All the books say children will never do that but well I say they are WRONG. Do what works for you my friend...love you.
Thx everyone! I just think it's funny that this is my line of work, now- I do lots of breastfeeding education- and I've broken almost every "rule"- I've used pacifiers and nipple shields from day one- as well as formula. She'll take anything from me as long as it's food:) she doesn't seem confused at all- but very adaptable. Go figure. Even so, I still struggle. Thx for loving me friends. Now- how to get her sleep! I forgot about these nights. Whew!!!!
Brooke, I totally gave Brookes formula a time or two a day early on. Also, nipple shields, pumped bottles...whatever. With Harper, I read all the books and would not give her a drop of formula. This time around I am more go-with-the-flow and it has been so much better! Just love that baby and the rest will take care of itself. I know you know all that...it's just nice hearing it : )
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