the older I get, the less adaptable I am to change.
I start day shift this week, and I feel the anxiety creeping in.
same job, mind you. just in the DAY.
how silly can I be.
Josh has been gone this week, too,- and so the rhythms get disrupted. I feel shaky and unsure at times.
I feel this way in Tulsa, a lot. It feels more like home than before, but it still feels more like a foreign country.
I wonder about friends of mine of moved from their countries years ago to live here. Do they ache for their homeland? I can't imagine.
I watched a movie today- "the other woman"- this title is very misleading, because it's much more about the loss of a child. oh my goodness, it was gut wrenching, and beautifully acted by Natalie Portman. It's up there with "and then she found me", as one of the more real and well acted films I have seen.
There is so much crap out there, selling us a life that doesn't exist- that I am oddly refreshed when a film portrays something very real and messy.
This films walks through grief, and you feel every ounce of it. but there is redemption in the end, and I happen to believe in that reality, too.
well, that was random. it's quiet here, gonna try and get some sleep.
good night all.
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