writers block

my updates have been few and far between, i know. many times i have opened up this blog, pressed the little button that says "compose" and then sit. and sit. and well, sit. this, time, though crap it might be, i will write....something. fall is finally here. josh and i have gone on some hikes the past couple of weekends. I always realize how different we are when we take walks. i seem to take in the whole scene, you know, enjoy all of the things that are beautiful. josh is all about the particular beauties. the little acorns that are the color of pumpkins. the bird, that is singing a fall song in some distant tree. I wish I could see like him. i miss so much.it is such a mystery, knowing people, even your husband. people wait and wait to make sure they get it right, finding that perfect someone. if we are honest, we can't know these things. we are made more creatively than that. we are prone to surprise and inconsistancy. I think this is beautiful.

Meanwhile, post-seminary life has had its ups and downs. I still don't know if I am democrat or republican. I don't know how I feel about cuss words. I use them, but am annoyed when they are used without caution. I am troubled about healthcare and minimum wage, and I am scared of living a suburbian life in the city. i am entertaining the idea of moving to the country. you see, i am not sure of many things.

until next time...